I have a skype that no one will talk to me on, is that sad? that's pretty sad

And no more trying too hard. Maybe if I just sit and be a lazy bum something'll come to me. :/
Just, go with the flow..
I'm not that kind of person! >_< I like to take motherfriggin action!

Maybe it was just too early in the morning..
But it's evident she doesn't like me. 9_9;

Fuck disappointment, I'm better than that :/
And screw feeling inadequate! I am not >:0.

nope, she doesnt like me. ._.

Maybe I'm just a cog meant to fit into another place...

I can't make her smile like that, wtf.

._. ttyl self esteem

[pijTjRrgpoksdgofee jealousy.

Dubbiel and Warren shouldn't be making music. =.= or, well rapping. They're nice guys, just not good rappers. They need to do some cyphers or something..

Whitest Black guys I know..

For those tuning in, I throw all my left over angst here. So, don't read it if you're looking for my normal sunshine happy cheeriness. That's all facebook, tumblr, aim.
I've been feeling so alone lately, not used to all this change..

All I see you do is complain about EVERYTHING on facebook statuses. God damn it you annoy me, you have so much but don't see it! If there is a good Lord, he isn't doing much for you.

I have all the time in the world for everyone else, it's just never the other way around. :/

I've come to learn that I am nothing but a small part of your existence. Even though I want to be something greater, I guess all I can do is move along./sigh/

Seriously, give me a chance? I'm a nice guy. ^_^; or so they say. I'm egotistical, and selfish. But I can be more :/

in the end I wasn't interesting enough, and didn't have a cell phone to remain in contact with her.
Eh, I guess I'm not too interesting.

I'm kind of okay with that. :D I feel good

spent 2 hours helping a friend with a paper. feels good :] at least someone was willing to put up with me ._.; no one else to talk to/talked to me besides Julian today.

learned some new cheesy pick up lines. /Made up.

Girl what kind of blood do you have, I think you're my type.
You make me want to be a pirate because I'm hooked.
girl you must be trash because I'm taking you out

Got a free mcChicken from McDonalds even though I paid for one, I got two.
I was hoping by some weird twist of fate she'd pop up and I'd be like

hey, have some food with me

I got out of work, and into the city by 5.
She gets out of illustration by five.
I was hoping to get lucky.

I can't keep her affections or attention like he can, I guess I'm just boring.

I don't mean to brag, but I think I have successfully detached myself a little from her, which is good. I need to be more like me. Show her who I really am, how I really am. I want her to like that part of me, not that crazy party that goes gaga over everything, I mean, I'm a pretty cool person if she wanted to know me. But if she doesn't I guess it's her loss.

Feeling forever aloneee, everyone has lives and I don't.. ._. I need to get out more.

Bad, bad bad Patrick. >_< I can't let my imagination run like that too often.

I just imagine me meeting up with her, while she's baby sitting her little cousins at a park or something. And she'll greet me, and I'll greet the tiny ones. One will hit me and she'll be excited. I'll just be like "What, you're my girlfriend? I can't believe that, you're too beautiful!" =_=.

stupid hopeless romantic thoughts.

haaaaaaa~

She can't dance

she can't sing,

but she sure knows how to steal my heart -_-;

Well, I can't say I'm not used to last minute changes. I was a little disappointed ._.;
but I still chuckled when I read this.

I'm too happy to care as much, but it sucks butt that I'm addicted to serotonin.

dispattisback1 10:57 pm
Reality check, did I just ask the girl I have a crush on to let me hang out with her, and read at a park, and she told me to bring my sketch book?
tlx1124 10:57 pm
hmmm

yep

why whats up?
dispattisback1 10:57 pm
I was wondering why I had a shine in my step, haha

nhiarei 10:02 pm
haiiiiiiii pattehh
dispattisback1 10:02 pm
What's up soggy? :]
nhiarei 10:02 pm
tired

lol
dispattisback1 10:02 pm
I got an extra blow dryer if you need any help, haha
nhiarei 10:02 pm
up reading

i need

a new straightneer
dispattisback1 10:03 pm
just let it sun dry for a few days, if it doesn't work I'll bake you some cookies and give it a proper burial. :D
nhiarei is away 10:03 pm
FEWD 1s ago
Stay in touch. Send nhiarei a text message
dispattisback1 10:03 pm
I don't think you'll need it though
I like pornstar hair ;D haha
nhiarei 10:03 pm
LOL

LMAOOO

I always feel like I'm pushing myself just to be let down.. I just want some messages of positive reinforcement.

I wish I was messaged more often then I messaged others. I feel lonely ._.

even more when she doesn't want to/can't talk to me. fff. Must not be dependent. I don't really need her or like her like that, I just have a small school-yard crush.

But if so, why do I want to be noticed by her so badly? :/

I don't want to be afraid of losing to some other guy. I don't want to regret not chasing a girl JUST BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID. fff

I shouldn't drag myself in too deep. I always screw myself overrrr. FUUUUUCK. But I want to try again, be open, I want to be real like I am with my friends.

She's been through some stuff too, she's human too, she's beautiful to me too.. ARGH, I always feel so ridiculous when I write about some girl, I've always been tired of breaking my own heart. asokdoskfsf.s ...

God damn it she makes my head hurt just thinking about it. How long has it been since I've been single? Well a while. I'm tired of it. I guess I just want to be a big part in someone else's life, just as much as they want to be in mine. She makes me laugh, and smile. I wish I knew who she was really, more about her. More in depth, I just want to know her strengths, weaknesses. I want to be the gear in her life, something that'll make my life meaningful, and hers too. I'm not looking for sex, just love. I'm not looking for a pretty face, I'm looking for the most beautiful heart, soul, and mind ever. Someone who's been through something and can say they're strong enough to smile no matter what.

Oh gee

I wrote : Well, good night miss sweetum, I know you got some demons I hope you can defeat 'em. Any time you want to I'll come and bust through. Fully armored on a horse crashing through the window. I can't do that unless you let me in though. Stay strong, live long, do what makes you happy. It's my way of saying good night, although it's really sappy.

reply: is that a flirt line? LMAO night patty

Maturity?

"God you're so fuckin' immature! Grow up and go to college already!"

Sorry, I don't lose my cool like you do when annoyed. Ever think, even if I'm the goofy one. Maybe I'm the mature one..? Such trivial things aren't as important as getting shit done.

I only ask you to better yourself because I already know all the mistakes I make, but you can't take me seriously enough because you're so in your own little world you don't realize that I'm just trying to help you. I know what you think. "Oh my older brother is so immature and annoying." There's a perfectly good reason. You obviously don't know me. And have never taken the time to even try. All you do is become annoyed by me. No respect for me because you suck at appreciating whatever is in front of you.

I'm sorry you don't get it, but don't go yelling about maturity when I just want you to do me a simple task. If you were just a bit more compassionate there wouldn't be any problems.

I'm obviously selfish, but is it too hard to ask for you to understand? I'm trying to give you respect, but I get none back? You yell at our mom, you yell at our dad whenever you get frustrated. You literally have no patience and it will prevent you from understanding anything about me. Sorry, but you still don't deserve the title of older sibling. Just because you're some how more mature. Just as mature as you claim, when you get mad over the tiniest thing. Dad trying to wake you up, Mom asking you a simple question which threatens you, I asking for a simple thing and you turning into the Hulk.

Call yourself mature all you want, but it's not true at all. Stop taking yourself so seriously, seriously.

This is for personal use. :D

no one will ever read this. I think, but I just want to make my own template to be honest.